Escaping the helter skelter of wrong

Yesterday we were on a bike ride and I caught myself (with a little help) having a good old moan (mostly in my head) because I'd lost track of where we were, which way we should go next, and because this was not how I had imagined it would be.

What I find interesting is that as long as you spend the time in your head telling yourself everything that is wrong with the situation, there is no escape. It's like being on a helter skelter careering madly downwards in a spiral.

There are two ways to step off the helter skelter of everything that's wrong.

The first is to switch your focus from all that is wrong externally, to being curious with what's going on with you right now.

It's like engaging a separate area of your brain from the part that's having a good old temper tantrum.

Engage the part that lets you go "That's interesting what the other part of my brain is doing right now. I wonder what it's really trying to achieve?"

Timothy Gallwey in The Inner Game of Work uses the acronym STOP for this, meaning:

• Step Back
• Think
• Organise Your Thoughts, and
• Proceed

The other way is to just ask yourself, "Where is the joy now?"

It's always there if you look for it, whether it's being out on your bike in the fresh air, being with someone you love, or in the experience of doing something new.